As the weeks go by and so much is happening as we approach the holidays, I sit in the quiet of my home with a fire going, my Christmas lights on, my cat Ariana in my lap, and the TV softly playing a Christmas movie. 

It’s natural that thoughts of the past, present, and future all fluidly float in and out. The days of babies writing their Christmas list for Santa, teenagers wanting more grown-up presents, and then now, children and grandchildren sending links to the presents they would like. It’s a gift to not have to go shopping all over the state to find the present they want yet I am thrilled that my grandson wants something I have to put together. It’s real physical participation in the joy of shopping for those I love.  Who knows what the future holds, but for now, this is a gift and fun to do. 

Clearly, adapting to all the changes life brings, all the “progress” that takes us away from many of the wonderful traditions that we knew, and loved, is a mixed blessing. I miss so many of the old traditions I had with little ones at home at Christmas time, yet I also appreciate the quiet and peace of my time now. It shows me that living and loving two contradictory situations is perfectly normal, even healthy. 

How often do you get caught in a belief that you are supposed to love this or that? That you need to let go of one thing in order to hold onto another? What if we simply loved it all but with love and acceptance, we hold onto both while settling comfortably into our new reality? 

This is applicable whether you are pulled in your career, your family as it grows, your town as it changes, your own body as it reminds you that 25 is further and further away from here…. 

Moments of sitting in the glory of what was doesn’t for a minute limit your ability to jump into the present, the current reality of your life with all that it entails. It’s a gift and a blessing to continue to be challenged to grow, to expand, to change your opinion, and to become so much more of who you are meant to be. 

The biggest obstacle I see to this adjustment is the story, or stories, you continue to tell yourself. A client today was mentioning how she is in so much pain because of a story she keeps telling herself about what her life was supposed to look like at this point. She is holding onto the past, to what her old vision was of who she should be, what she should be doing, and how her life should look. Those dreams fed her in the past, but they are hindering her in the present and hurting her future. 

Love what you used to believe, what your dreams used to be, and even who and what you and your life used to be, but being a passionate, healthy, and fully alive adult now, requires being open to what is – and falling in love with the life and the you, you have created. This is your present reality and what a gift it is. 

I wish each of you a glorious week as you sit in appreciation of the past, relax in the present, and lovingly look forward to the future you are creating…

Dorothy

About Dorothy

Dr. Dorothy’s life story of coming from an orphanage, being raised in the housing projects of South Boston, becoming a Catholic nun, an international airline stewardess, a wife, mother, graduate faculty member, Clinical Instructor at a Medical School, and so much more provides the perfect backdrop for her message of joy, humor, passion and faith as the necessary tools for life.