I held a one-day intensive this Saturday for the women in my current 10-month Women in Transition program. As happens, a great deal of additional self-awareness and accountability was ever-present for these amazing women who were willing to risk being fully present and thus fully real. 

One frame of reference we discussed was, are powerful women in authority really like a fox in a hen house, out to get all those around them as one was told, or are they more like the farmer who is calling all his/her hens and chickens to grow continuously, while keeping the “fox” of self-betrayal, self-illusions, and overwhelm from ruining the scene? It is a powerful reframe for so many women who can lead with their hearts as well as their heads knowing they want results but that the stern, demanding style of leadership isn’t respected or even their natural style. 

We also saw that each of us can easily create a “story” about what is happening in our lives, generating a perspective that can keep us small, reactionary, in defense, and focused on survival. A healthier option is seeing the reality of who we are, with all the journeys we have walked, and the growth achieved from every one of them. Use that reference as your starting point in achieving your dreams without the hindrances of the stories.  

When we do so, we are able to focus on our possibilities, purpose, and passion to make things happen.

Without a sense of our own purpose, we can aimlessly go through life just taking whatever opportunity presents itself whether it is truly what we want or not. When we aren’t clear on where we want to go, who we want to become, or what we honestly want to accomplish, it all stays out of reach. 

Knowing the stories you have collected, even recognizing them as stories, can be difficult since theoretically, they all make sense: “You can’t succeed without a PhD.” ‘You can’t get promoted twice in one year.” “You can’t move into a new area without having to start all over.” “Your company can’t expand unless….” “You have to work to exhaustion to achieve success.” The one telltale sign in recognizing a story is that it limits you. If that’s the case, it’s not a fact; it’s a message perpetuated by someone who never risked, never took a chance to expand, change, or transition to something more. 

My question for you is, do you connect with your own intuition or the outside stories? With your own sense of what is next for you? Your own inner calling for something different? Greater? More expansive? If so, trust it, trust you. Connect with your truth. Never connect with the stories. Certainly assess, evaluate, prepare, and look at the details and the 30,000 ft. view, but if it is calling you, jump in and follow your passion and your purpose. You will come alive in ways you never imagined. Frequently it requires taking a risk to feel your purpose and your passion. The adrenalin is your life energy coming alive, calling you to your next adventure, your next dream, and the next evolution of you. 

We can easily connect to the safe way, it’s logical. Solely logical, however. What about passion, purpose, and possibilities? What about connecting to a belief in living this life not surviving it? What about those you have known or read about who accomplished what couldn’t be accomplished? What about leaving a legacy of living life to those who will follow you? 

If something didn’t work out, was it worth it? Most always I hear, “Most definitely.” How often do we hear that on their death bed so many say the regret, if they have any, is for what they didn’t do, not for what they did? Leave here without regrets. Follow that dream, take that trip, keep loving, and stay connected with all the dreams, possibilities, purpose, and passion you have. What better way to truly live on earth is there?     


About Dorothy

Dr. Dorothy’s life story of coming from an orphanage, being raised in the housing projects of South Boston, becoming a Catholic nun, an international airline stewardess, a wife, mother, graduate faculty member, Clinical Instructor at a Medical School, and so much more provides the perfect backdrop for her message of joy, humor, passion and faith as the necessary tools for life.